Kendo talk
Oct. 21st, 2006 03:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tarigwaemirLowell House on the Feast of Ste. Celine
::sighs:: First full bogu practice today. It was great...but it also sucked because I should have done better than that. Actually, mawari-geiko was fine because it was an opportunity for me to focus on some of the problems that Kofi pointed out last week (extending the arms, tenouchi, striking from a farther distance). Extension seems to be the most crucial point, and I really ought to start doing daily suburi to practice. Still having trouble with kote-men, although breaking it down today helped (I never lift up enough on the men strike though), and my dou-uchi is abominable.
Towards the end of rotations, I got really tired, and my muscles felt like they just collapsed on me. Lost control of my shinai and accidentally stabbed Jenn in the throat under her men. ::sighs:: That was awful. The fatigue continued into my jigeiko match with Kofi, and wow, I was so ashamed of myself. I had no kiai and no sense of center. Actually, it's always very hard for me to play Kofi because I go in wanting to do my best, except that always translates into me getting very tense and wasting all my energy on meaningless attacks. The problem is, I know I've lost just as I start to move, and it shows. A major part of the problem is that I don't know how to take center against Kofi; he doesn't show openings, and I can't seem to make them. I suppose that's what seme really is. Anyway, it makes me feel off-balance and uncertain of myself, which only makes me grow worse and worse and worse. Actually, the other part of the problem is purely psychological: I should be able to overcome my anxiety when going up against a superior opponent instead of holding back even more. I've been noticing that in myself lately, and it's very disappointing. I mean, the whole thrill of kendo when I first began came from the rush that you get when you know that you are going to be killed but you throw yourself forward anyway. I've always felt that kendo taught me courage, so I hate it when I feel like I'm playing like a coward.
But in any case, I really need to work on my arm strength (argh, my arms still feel weak and jiggly, like jello) and my stamina.
Second jigeiko was with Jon, and I took the lazy option of playing defensively. Well, it's not entirely unjustified since that is probably the most effective style for me, but in any case, it was a nice breather. I left too many openings though. And boy, was I pissed when Jon asked me to just "kill him quickly" since he was tired and wanted the match to be over. What a wimp! Sorry, I think complaining about fatigue is just unacceptable, especially when it comes from someone who is obviously taller and stronger than me. Also, what cheek to ask a senpai to end a match quickly for you! If I said that to any of my senpai, I'm sure they would then proceed to beat me into the ground. I mean, I was practically falling apart during my match with Kofi, but I still didn't complain, and I felt bad enough as it was for being less than my best throughout the match. I was also annoyed because earlier Jon had been tired during 9-point uchikomi and had not tried to make distance as motodachi (thus making the drill that much more difficult for me since I had to break my momentum after every strike to back up since he was too close each time). I mean, I was feeling tired by that point as well but I'd done my best to make distance for him when I was motodachi. I mean, honestly! And then to pull the "I'm tired, can we take it easy" stunt again?
Okay, I should also probably add that I dislike Jon because when he isn't speaking patronizingly to me, he's trying to suck up, and that's the type of person I hate most. Knowing though that my irritation is largely irrational and grudge-driven, I try to be nice to him because after all he is my kouhai. -_- Anyway, in the interests of fairness, I probably would have cut him more slack if it were another kouhai. I mean, Jenn was tired too, but I wasn't annoyed by that at all. Also, Jenn says that his girlfriend Eugenia (who has been playing kendo for eleven years) is really harsh on him (although frankly I'd be honored if Eugenia took me seriously enough to do that...I've always gotten the sense that she's horribly bored when I'm in jigeiko with her). But still! Quite a few of the current veterans who joined up last year break a little too easily, and I've always wondered if I'd done something wrong to cause that. I mean, were practices not hard enough? Did we go too easy on them? Then I think of Eva, Howard and Allen and feel reassured.
You know, I never know where to strike the balance between being too mean and too nice. That was the worst part about being captain last year. Alumni and Daera told me I was being too nice, but then I felt guilty if I was being too mean. Sheesh.
Anyway, third jigeiko was with Suzuki-san, and I...er...got really, really lazy and didn't even try. I'm going to get slaughtered at Alumni Weekend, aren't I? I think I should go to Tuesday practice to prepare myself some more, although I need to figure out how to pull it off without letting Mother know since I have a paper due next Friday, and she has been worrying about it on my behalf for the past few days. Sometimes, pouring out your stress to your parents can be cathartic in that moment but a very bad decision in the long run.
I think for Alumni Weekend, I'm going to focus on (1) extending so that my strike doesn't hit men-gane, (2) finding the right distance, and (3) using tenouchi correctly. I should worry about footwork and center too, but I do need to set some priorities. (Argh, I still lift my knee too high for fumikomi. When will I ever get that right? >_<)
Looking back at this tirade, I sound like being captain was a miserable experience last year, but that isn't true at all. I stressed a bit over the experience, but then again, I stress over everything in my life. I loved every moment of it, and I especially loved watching all our "kendo babies" improve week by week and cream people at the Shoryuhai. ^_^
Yours &c.
::sighs:: First full bogu practice today. It was great...but it also sucked because I should have done better than that. Actually, mawari-geiko was fine because it was an opportunity for me to focus on some of the problems that Kofi pointed out last week (extending the arms, tenouchi, striking from a farther distance). Extension seems to be the most crucial point, and I really ought to start doing daily suburi to practice. Still having trouble with kote-men, although breaking it down today helped (I never lift up enough on the men strike though), and my dou-uchi is abominable.
Towards the end of rotations, I got really tired, and my muscles felt like they just collapsed on me. Lost control of my shinai and accidentally stabbed Jenn in the throat under her men. ::sighs:: That was awful. The fatigue continued into my jigeiko match with Kofi, and wow, I was so ashamed of myself. I had no kiai and no sense of center. Actually, it's always very hard for me to play Kofi because I go in wanting to do my best, except that always translates into me getting very tense and wasting all my energy on meaningless attacks. The problem is, I know I've lost just as I start to move, and it shows. A major part of the problem is that I don't know how to take center against Kofi; he doesn't show openings, and I can't seem to make them. I suppose that's what seme really is. Anyway, it makes me feel off-balance and uncertain of myself, which only makes me grow worse and worse and worse. Actually, the other part of the problem is purely psychological: I should be able to overcome my anxiety when going up against a superior opponent instead of holding back even more. I've been noticing that in myself lately, and it's very disappointing. I mean, the whole thrill of kendo when I first began came from the rush that you get when you know that you are going to be killed but you throw yourself forward anyway. I've always felt that kendo taught me courage, so I hate it when I feel like I'm playing like a coward.
But in any case, I really need to work on my arm strength (argh, my arms still feel weak and jiggly, like jello) and my stamina.
Second jigeiko was with Jon, and I took the lazy option of playing defensively. Well, it's not entirely unjustified since that is probably the most effective style for me, but in any case, it was a nice breather. I left too many openings though. And boy, was I pissed when Jon asked me to just "kill him quickly" since he was tired and wanted the match to be over. What a wimp! Sorry, I think complaining about fatigue is just unacceptable, especially when it comes from someone who is obviously taller and stronger than me. Also, what cheek to ask a senpai to end a match quickly for you! If I said that to any of my senpai, I'm sure they would then proceed to beat me into the ground. I mean, I was practically falling apart during my match with Kofi, but I still didn't complain, and I felt bad enough as it was for being less than my best throughout the match. I was also annoyed because earlier Jon had been tired during 9-point uchikomi and had not tried to make distance as motodachi (thus making the drill that much more difficult for me since I had to break my momentum after every strike to back up since he was too close each time). I mean, I was feeling tired by that point as well but I'd done my best to make distance for him when I was motodachi. I mean, honestly! And then to pull the "I'm tired, can we take it easy" stunt again?
Okay, I should also probably add that I dislike Jon because when he isn't speaking patronizingly to me, he's trying to suck up, and that's the type of person I hate most. Knowing though that my irritation is largely irrational and grudge-driven, I try to be nice to him because after all he is my kouhai. -_- Anyway, in the interests of fairness, I probably would have cut him more slack if it were another kouhai. I mean, Jenn was tired too, but I wasn't annoyed by that at all. Also, Jenn says that his girlfriend Eugenia (who has been playing kendo for eleven years) is really harsh on him (although frankly I'd be honored if Eugenia took me seriously enough to do that...I've always gotten the sense that she's horribly bored when I'm in jigeiko with her). But still! Quite a few of the current veterans who joined up last year break a little too easily, and I've always wondered if I'd done something wrong to cause that. I mean, were practices not hard enough? Did we go too easy on them? Then I think of Eva, Howard and Allen and feel reassured.
You know, I never know where to strike the balance between being too mean and too nice. That was the worst part about being captain last year. Alumni and Daera told me I was being too nice, but then I felt guilty if I was being too mean. Sheesh.
Anyway, third jigeiko was with Suzuki-san, and I...er...got really, really lazy and didn't even try. I'm going to get slaughtered at Alumni Weekend, aren't I? I think I should go to Tuesday practice to prepare myself some more, although I need to figure out how to pull it off without letting Mother know since I have a paper due next Friday, and she has been worrying about it on my behalf for the past few days. Sometimes, pouring out your stress to your parents can be cathartic in that moment but a very bad decision in the long run.
I think for Alumni Weekend, I'm going to focus on (1) extending so that my strike doesn't hit men-gane, (2) finding the right distance, and (3) using tenouchi correctly. I should worry about footwork and center too, but I do need to set some priorities. (Argh, I still lift my knee too high for fumikomi. When will I ever get that right? >_<)
Looking back at this tirade, I sound like being captain was a miserable experience last year, but that isn't true at all. I stressed a bit over the experience, but then again, I stress over everything in my life. I loved every moment of it, and I especially loved watching all our "kendo babies" improve week by week and cream people at the Shoryuhai. ^_^
Yours &c.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2006-10-23 01:46 am (UTC)nice vs. mean is an interesting captain paradox...esp when your'e dealing with froshies, because if you're too mean you can scare them away, yknow? the older ones can take a bit more (uhh although i promise not to send any more alumn-esque emails before i've had my morning coffee...). but from what i hear, you did a very nice job with your babies. and they looked pretty good at shoryuhai, too. you were a good mama, methinks :D
(no subject)
Date: 2006-10-23 09:20 pm (UTC)Not sure if the multiple angry emails are even having an effect. I spent Saturday calling up veterans one by one. -_-;; Hopefully people will show up for Alumni Weekend at least.
I think I'm looking forward most to next year's Shoryuhai. XD