In which Tari digs herself into a hole
Oct. 27th, 2003 09:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tarigwaemirAd Mundo Exteriore,
I feel faintly depressed. I'm not sure why, but I think it's the prospect of the midterm tomorrow, for which I have failed to study properly, despite the fact that I emptied my afternoon schedule for that express purpose. Instead I read the math textbook, burned off the anime files on my computer (50% free space now), reorganized my music files, finished my Korean homework for Wednesday and reread Penguin Brothers.
Well, I didn't completely slack off. >_> But ugh, I need to read over all these pages, and I'm suddenly feeling unmotivated. I think what's wrong is that last year broke my confidence (thank you, AP Physics and Honors Mathematics), and college hasn't really helped me get it back, especially after that biology midterm. I've sat through two midterms by now, but both of them were in subjects where I knew most of the background material already. I don't feel at all prepared for Roman history and literature, particularly since most of my previous knowledge stems from reading I, Claudius and some remnants of the eighth grade research paper that looked into the beginning of the feudal era.
Someone told me to relax, that since it's only a Core class, I only need to focus on passing. Which is rather relieving, when I remember to think of that. Unfortunately, my brain is still wired in the "I'm supposed to excel in all subjects" mode. -_- I think after this midterm I'll have a bit of a breather--the Korean midterm requires some studying but nothing terribly intense--and maybe I can focus again on enjoying the moment rather than worrying about the future. ::sighs:: Father says, I just need to concentrate on, well, my concentration (i.e. major, for you other colleges), and I probably should take his advice. (That reminds me...those biology problem sets...still undone.)
Sorry for forcing you all to listen to my self-therapy sessions. ^_^ I'm surprisingly adept at making myself feel better though.
In other news, I've discovered the wonders of Internet radio. Hurrah for college broadband connections! There's a station that plays Renaissance and Baroque music, and those are the styles that are particularly conducive to my thinking. I think it's because they have that sort of focused, yet intricate quality to them, very geometric and not dramatic or emotional. I can't listen to, say, Phantom of the Opera when I'm studying. I start sniffling over the lyrics, especially during the finale song. I need either extremely complex polyphonic instrumental works or plain Gregorian chants to get me to settle down without falling asleep. Part of the reason why I've been playing the Art of Fugue so often recently...though there's only so many times before listening to the same Contrapunctus over and over again turns into irritation. (Hey, don't look at me as if I've commited some sort of sacrilege! I'm not really a musical person!)
...Tari
I feel faintly depressed. I'm not sure why, but I think it's the prospect of the midterm tomorrow, for which I have failed to study properly, despite the fact that I emptied my afternoon schedule for that express purpose. Instead I read the math textbook, burned off the anime files on my computer (50% free space now), reorganized my music files, finished my Korean homework for Wednesday and reread Penguin Brothers.
Well, I didn't completely slack off. >_> But ugh, I need to read over all these pages, and I'm suddenly feeling unmotivated. I think what's wrong is that last year broke my confidence (thank you, AP Physics and Honors Mathematics), and college hasn't really helped me get it back, especially after that biology midterm. I've sat through two midterms by now, but both of them were in subjects where I knew most of the background material already. I don't feel at all prepared for Roman history and literature, particularly since most of my previous knowledge stems from reading I, Claudius and some remnants of the eighth grade research paper that looked into the beginning of the feudal era.
Someone told me to relax, that since it's only a Core class, I only need to focus on passing. Which is rather relieving, when I remember to think of that. Unfortunately, my brain is still wired in the "I'm supposed to excel in all subjects" mode. -_- I think after this midterm I'll have a bit of a breather--the Korean midterm requires some studying but nothing terribly intense--and maybe I can focus again on enjoying the moment rather than worrying about the future. ::sighs:: Father says, I just need to concentrate on, well, my concentration (i.e. major, for you other colleges), and I probably should take his advice. (That reminds me...those biology problem sets...still undone.)
Sorry for forcing you all to listen to my self-therapy sessions. ^_^ I'm surprisingly adept at making myself feel better though.
In other news, I've discovered the wonders of Internet radio. Hurrah for college broadband connections! There's a station that plays Renaissance and Baroque music, and those are the styles that are particularly conducive to my thinking. I think it's because they have that sort of focused, yet intricate quality to them, very geometric and not dramatic or emotional. I can't listen to, say, Phantom of the Opera when I'm studying. I start sniffling over the lyrics, especially during the finale song. I need either extremely complex polyphonic instrumental works or plain Gregorian chants to get me to settle down without falling asleep. Part of the reason why I've been playing the Art of Fugue so often recently...though there's only so many times before listening to the same Contrapunctus over and over again turns into irritation. (Hey, don't look at me as if I've commited some sort of sacrilege! I'm not really a musical person!)
...Tari
